Clint Dempsey got a three-game ban, Twitter approves and is furious

A few days ago, Seattle Sounders and U.S. men’s national team captain Clint Dempsey got sent off in stoppage time for ripping up the referee’s notebook in a U.S. Open Cup (USOC) match.

It was hilarious. I mean, it was deplorable behavior not befitting a role model and should be punishable by a slow tar and feathering.

But the people’s opinions weren’t of consequence. The sentencing was to be handled by people in suits and/or button-down shirts. We learned a penalty would be handed down by Major League Soccer, even though the incident occurred during a USOC match. A USOC Disciplinary Committee had the power to impose a separate penalty. The nation waited, solemnly.

Today, we learned Deuce’s fate: an earth-shattering . . . three-game suspension.

MLS Deputy Commissioner Mark Abbott issued a statement:

“We do not tolerate conduct of this nature from any of our players. No matter how passionate our players are or what happens in the ‘heat of the moment,’ they must always respect all aspects of the game, especially the referees. In light of Clint’s actions and our past precedents, we felt that a significant suspension was appropriate.”

People chuckled. I know I did. And then Sports Illustrated’s Brian Straus dropped this on us:

https://twitter.com/BrianStraus/status/611976842900324352

My immediate reaction was:

Good times, right? In fact, times like this are made for Twitter reactions and hot takes. So here are some of the best Dempsey reactions from the Twitterverse. Enjoy.

https://twitter.com/cmpn/status/611981740035325952/photo/1

Oops. Wrong Dempsey, I think.

https://twitter.com/carlos_dase/status/611980433136357376

VERY BAD, CLINTON. VERY BAD SOCCER, CLINTON.

Appropriately dealt with?

But we saw him do shit, like, with our own eyes.

This one was inevitable.

Oh. Oops. Wrong Dempsey. Maybe.

*RIMSHOT!*

https://twitter.com/atomicnumber3/status/611975356262682624

Beautiful symbolism. Never changing because of tradition is America.

Nice job, everyone.

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