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Man Crush Monday: Sailing the high seas with Mario Götze

There’s been so much hot Bundesliga action lately, so it’s time for another Teutonic Man Crush Monday: Bayern Munich attacking midfielder Mario Götze.

In the annals of cute, young, soccer heartthrobs, Gotze is a classic. Those chubby little cheeks, those perfectly groomed eyebrows, that shifting blonde side-part/fauxhawk thingy. I mean, look, earrings – that’s so ‘90s, which just happens to be the decade in which he was born.

Germany v Algeria: Round of 16 - 2014 FIFA World Cup Brazil

Awww, a tender little youngin’! It’s enough to make a relatively young lady feel like a very naughty and experienced older woman.

Look, some haters like to say he’s not playing as well at Munich as he was at Bayern. Whatever, that’s fine, because this will make up for it – just google his name and boat “boat.” That of course refers to these amazing pictures of him in a Speedo looking rather excited.

Screen Shot 2015-04-10 at 11.47.51 AM

Ahoy, matey! The water clearly wasn’t cold there!

Okay, that lady enjoying the high seas is his girlfriend, a smoking-hot swimsuit model named Kathrin Brommel.

Germany v Argentina: 2014 FIFA World Cup Brazil Final

And he’s soooooo proud to occasionally post a photo of her own his Instagram, which he always hashtags #partofGoetze.

👌👍 @annkathrin_vida #PartOfGoetze

A photo posted by Mario Götze ⭐️️ (@gotzemario) on

But hey, we saw those Speedo photos, Mario. There’s definitely one part that’s big enough to share!

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